I’m always amazed at the strong opinions people have about everyone else’s reproductive decisions, so I have no doubt that you’re already “enlightened” about the best age to have a baby.
I ended up having babies when I was a little older (35 and 38) and believe me, it didn’t go unnoticed by my family or complete strangers at the mall. This got me thinking about ages, so I did a little research online to see if there was a “perfect” age to jump on the baby train.
Some scientists decided that the best age to have a baby, taking into account physical, social and economic factors, was 32.
I don’t know how helpful this is considering I know some really solid, smart 20 year olds and some completely confused pissed off poor 40 year olds.
Physically, it seems that somewhere between 18 and 22 (easy there, creepy) is your best bet, and financially, let’s face it, never.
So, based on nothing, here are just a few factors that I think are positives for having babies at either end of the clock.
Having babies when you’re younger:
- Newer Equipment. All the gears and whistles haven’t been cranked for too long, so the machine will recover a little quicker, and there’s less risk of birth defects and miscarriage.
- You don’t know better. This should not be offensive. I seriously think it’s an advantage sometimes to jump in blind because, come on, are we ever ready for motherhood?
- More energy. Yes, yes, I know there are 60-year-old Spitfires out there, and many of you will say you have more energy now than you did in your twenties, but generally speaking, I was better equipped to run after a toddler at 21 than at 38.
- Your support system may be newer. If you’re 20 and your mother was 20 when she had you, then she’s a 40-year-old struggling grandma while other people her age are still having babies. (Note: this is a minus if she does have a baby because she won’t want to help with your shit when she has hers.)
- You are still young when your children are older. How awesome would it be to have a kid go off to college when you’re 40?
- You could be around for some grandchildren AND great grandchildren. If everyone follows your trend, you might be around to see a lot of babies, which is nice. Although you might be expected to help with future generation shit, which isn’t great, but hopefully they’ll have invented something to make it go away.
- Trailblazer. Many of your friends may not already have children, so there may be sharp, laid-back people who are willing to help with the new novelty of a baby.
Having babies when you’re older:
- Money and career. Having a baby might not be such a juggling act if you have a stable career and bank balance. If you think about it, it’s easier to do almost anything with an established career and bank balance.
- Been there, done that. You might not miss the scene that is often crammed with having a baby because you’re over it. I don’t miss the party at 2am because I already did. Who am I kidding? I did well. :: hell yes ::
- Your friends have paved the way. Ahhh, nothing beats the advice of “don’t waste your money on this stroller, it’s crap” and pristine applause from your friends who’ve already been in the trenches for a while.
- Ball development. I’m not suggesting you don’t have balls when you’re younger, but if you were a sassy kitten in your 20s, then you’ll be a throat-ripping cougar in your 40s. Someone who said something that would have made you cry 10 years ago, now you face it and decide if it’s cleaner to punch them in the throat or burn their house down.
- Softer. You may be less likely to go crazy over things when you have some life experience to put it all under your belt. (Could add to this too, but this is supposed to be a positive list.)
- You know better. I think about what an idiot I was in my 20s, so I’m glad I had those years to figure myself out before adding a baby to the mix. (To be clear, I’m sure I’ll think I was an idiot at 40 when I’m 60.)
- Experience. I love the fact that I have been able to bring more life knowledge to motherhood than I could have 15 years ago. I can whistle with my fingers and drive a stick shift now.
So what is the best age to have a baby?
This is entirely up to you.
Whether you decide to have babies when you’re older or younger (or accidentally the decision was made for you), I think there are definitely advantages to both sides. At the end of the day, you have to provide love, shelter and guidance to a baby, and you can do that at almost any age.
So people who say someone is too young or too old to have a baby better hope they aren’t saying that to a young woman who has the energy to kick her ass or an older woman who knows how to throw her body around.
Our next reco: 5 Ways Being a Mom Made Me Grow Up
