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Home»Sexual Health»The discussion of the Epstein files is mistaken for pedophilia and power
Sexual Health

The discussion of the Epstein files is mistaken for pedophilia and power

healthtostBy healthtostMarch 2, 2026No Comments7 Mins Read
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The release of the Epstein files continues to dominate the headlines for what is and is not included.

On February 25, 2026, nearly a month after documents were dropped on January 30, 2026 by the Department of Justice, New York Times and NPR referred to missing memos about President Donald Trump’s relationship with convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein.

Earlier in February, access was given to members of Congress unedited versions of these documents. Representative Cynthia Lummis, Republican of Wyoming; he had this to say when he left the screening room: “I was not one of the members who took it up as an issue. … But 9-year-old victims … wow.”

“Well, initially, my reaction to all of this was, ‘I don’t care. I don’t know what the big deal is,” he said. added. “But now I see what the big deal is and it was worth investigating.”

Whether she meant to or not, Lummis’ comments suggested that an alleged global sex-trafficking ring involving some of the world’s most powerful people—including, possibly, president of the united states and several of his high-ranking officialsalthough they deny all the allegations – it wasn’t such a big deal when he thought the survivors were teenagers and young adults.

That sentiment echoes something former Fox News anchor Megyn Kelly said about the ages of survivors when a previous round of Epstein files was released in November 2025. On her podcast, Kelly expressed sympathy for the idea that Epstein he wasn’t really a pedophile because they were in 15-year-olds—not 8-year-olds. He didn’t like children, Kelly explained, so much as he liked them “barely legitimately.”

But “barely legal” isn’t a thing (I’ll get to that in a minute), and the random nuances of the definition of pedophilia shouldn’t be either.

Age is not just a number

Let’s start by clarifying our terms: Pedophiles are people who have a sexual preference for childrenusually pre-adolescent children or those around the age of puberty. Pedophilia is a psychiatric diagnosis. You can be a pedophile without sexually abusing children, and you can be a pedophile without meeting the diagnostic definition of a pedophile.

The word pedophile immediately brings to mind child abuse, which makes our hearts break and our skin crawl. This visceral reaction is understandable and may explain why Lummis, Kelly and other public figures have insisted on distinguishing between the abuse of young children and the rape of teenagers.

To be clear, the law does not distinguish between a 9-year-old and a 15-year-old — both minors — regarding sex. While age of consent laws vary by state, all states consider 15 too young to consent. With the possible rare exception of consenting couples who are close in age (for example, 18-year-old high school senior dating 15-year-old sophomore), any adult who has sex with someone 15 or younger has committed a crime.

In some cases, this crime is statutory rape. In others it may be rape or sexual assault. And in some states, teens having sex with teens is also illegal.

As I said, there are only legal and illegal — not “barely legal.”

When consent is not possible

I believe that teenagers should experiment with sex. I have spent much of my career as a sex educator arguing that sexual development and experimentation are natural parts of adolescence that help young people understand themselves and develop the relationship skills they will need as adults. Adults should see high school students as capable of having consensual sex with each other.

But relationships can only be consensual if the couple is on an equal footing. When someone is too controlling because of their age, status, or position in relation to another (think coach, teacher, or boss), true consent is rarely possible. Age isn’t the only power imbalance, but it seems obvious that a 51-year-old man seeking sex from a 14-year-old woman is a predator – not a partner.

The late financier Epstein has been accused of sexually assaulting at least 1,000 young women and children. He had a pattern to offer money to teenage girls as young as 14 for massages, during which he would they masturbate and touch their genitals with his fingers or sex toys. He would offer these guys more money if they recruited other girls for the same thing.

Epstein has also been accused of rape of 14-year-old girls. (Epstein pleaded guilty in soliciting a minor for sex in Florida in 2008 and was charged with sex trafficking in 2019, but died in prison before a trial could begin.)

Survivors also said they were abused, assaulted or raped by Epstein’s friends and acquaintances. President Trump has been named in these allegations. The allegations against Trump have not been investigated or verified, but he has previously was found civilly liable for sexual abuse.

Let’s stop saying “underage women”

Wondering whether Epstein or others among his young friends we like were “really pedophiles” like Megyn Kelly was is a twisted game of hair-splitting.

It opens the door for some sex offenders to be removed by implying that the pedophile who preys on small children is perverted, while the CEO who preys on teenagers is just bad behavior. It’s bad but not that bad.

I have to wonder if that’s what some of the men involved in Epstein’s sex told themselves. When Trump embraced the QAnon conspiracy theory that there was one secret scourge of powerful pedophiles who abuse children and made the revelation part of his 2024 campaign strategy, didn’t he remember partying with Epstein? Or did he think his name wouldn’t come out because he didn’t consider himself a pedophile?

For some people — and I bet Trump, Loomis, and Kelly are in that group — the distinction between an 8-year-old and a 15-year-old probably seems important because 15-year-old girls can be sexual. Most have breasts and curves and pubic hair. They may wear makeup and short skirts. They are probably thinking boys or girls or both. They may read spicy books and have sexual fantasies.

Some 15 year olds even sex: In 2023, 16 percent of ninth graders and 25 percent of 10th graders reported having had sex. That’s probably why we’ve seen so many people—including some legitimate news sourceslike NPR—refer to young girls as “minor women.” Again, that’s not the point. Even with high heels and mascara, being “minor” means being a kid.

And children are children – not women. To suggest otherwise could lead to blaming the girls for wearing the wrong clothes, making bad choices, leading the men, or other things we tend to put on rape survivors in retrospect.

It’s a matter of power

We should stop talking about the age of Epstein’s victims and start talking about theirs sexual activity—that is, their ability to make conscious, informed, and empowered decisions. Agency is having a voice and being able to negotiate what you want.

It seems clear to me that the men of this sex ring were looking for those who had no agency. Girls and women was reportedly they were lied to, coerced, threatened and possibly held against their will. Men did not want sexual partners. they wanted control.

None of this is meant to downplay the horrors of 9-year-olds being trafficked. If anything, I want to refresh (I know that’s not a word, but I need it) the horror of 19-year-olds being trafficked. Although the law may see them as adults, these young women were not empowered to make their own decisions about how they would be treated or what they would and would not do.

The emerging revelations that young children were victims of Epstein’s crimes may make some people, like Loomis, start paying attention and may make others, like Kelly, shut up. My hope, however, is that we can stop debating whether the men were pedophiles and start focusing on the survivors.

We can do survivors a service by listening to their stories and believing them — no matter how old they were at the time of their abuse.

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