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We all know that emotions can flare up, especially in toddlers. But what many parents don’t expect is how big the emotions can be when our children reach elementary school. Ages 5 to 12 come with a whole new wave of emotional challenges that are often misunderstood or dismissed as “misbehavior.” We assume emotional outbursts are just a part of the toddler stage, but they don’t go away. . . they just shift. That’s why it’s so important for parents to understand emotional intelligence, not only to help our kids calm down during meltdowns, but to teach them how to feel, process, and regulate emotions in healthy, connected ways. And here’s the real kicker: the best way to teach it? It’s practicing it on our own, which, let’s be honest, most of us were never taught how to do.
On this episode of Chick Chat, I’m joined by Alyssa Blask Campbell, leading expert on childhood emotional development, best-selling author, and founder of Seed & Sew. Alyssa is passionate about helping parents and caregivers raise emotionally intelligent people through real-life tools and neuroscience-backed strategies that have lasting impact.
Together, we dive into the emotional world of “big kids,” why their behavior is often misinterpreted, and how parents can tune their own nervous systems so they can connect with rather than react to their children. If you are navigating contempt, meltdown, or just want to better understand your child’s emotional world – this is for you.
Meet Alyssa Blask Campbell
Alyssa Blask Campbell, M.Ed.is an emotional development expert, preschool educator and founder Seed & Sewinga platform dedicated to supporting emotional well-being in children and adults. She is the bestselling author Tiny People, Big Emotionsand now her latest book, Big kids, big feelings: Navigating Contempt, Breakdown, and Anxiety for Self-Esteem, Connected Children.
Alyssa is also the creator of Collaborative Emotion Processing (CEP), a five-step framework that equips adults with the tools to support children through big emotions – while doing the inner work to process their own. Through her books, podcast (Voices of your village), and programs, Alyssa has helped thousands of families shift from chaos to connection by understanding the root of emotional behavior and building real-world strategies for regulation and resilience.
What did we discuss?
This episode was extremely validating and educational for me. Alyssa and I covered:
- Because the elementary years (ages 5-12) are critical for emotional development
- What is it really it happens during those “challenging” or anxious moments
- The importance of adult nervous system regulation and how to recognize when you are dysregulated
- Alyssa’s FACTS acronym and how it helps parents stay grounded during tough times
- How to shift from reactive parenting to intentional, connected responses
- What it means to normalize the full emotional spectrum for our children
- Highlights from her new book, Big kids, big feelings
- A message every devastated parent wants to hear
Final Thoughts
Raising children with emotional intelligence isn’t just about teaching them to calm down. Although we may feel like this is what we need to do right now, what we need to work on is modeling regulation, building trust and holding space for all emotions — big and small, wanted and not so wanted. Alyssa’s work reminds us that we don’t have to be perfect to raise connected kids—thank goodness. We just have to keep showing up, being present, being curious, and being willing to do the work with them. In all honesty, we are learning as much as they are.
Whether your child is dealing with anxiety, a meltdown, or just everyday challenges, this episode is a must-listen. It’s filled with supportive ideas, actionable tools, and the kind of grace every parent deserves to hear.
Alyssa’s Resources:
Mentioned in the episode:
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