Swipe left, Super Like, send a rose. Many of us are familiar with these terms. Dating apps are more popular than ever, especially after the pandemic. Tinder reported its busiest year in 2020, and Hinge tripled its revenue from 2019-2020 (Jamal, 2021). Dating apps give us access to a large group of people we might not otherwise meet. Whether you’re looking for a casual hookup, a new friend, or a relationship, apps like Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, and Grindr are becoming the increasingly common answer. With all the benefits, why isn’t everyone on dating apps? Well, it turns out that some things can be too good to be true. For some people, dating apps can be frustrating as they feel like everyone is looking for a casual hookup, and research shows that people who use dating apps are more likely to engage in risky sexual behaviors. So are dating apps the solution to modern dating or part of the problem? Let’s dive into it.
Should we swipe right?
Casual sex is becoming more common and accepted, especially among young adults, and dating apps make it possible to have and find multiple sexual partners. If that’s not what you’re looking for, dating apps are also great for starting new and potentially long-term relationships (Sutton & Blair, 2020). Regardless of your purpose for being on a dating app, the convenience and effectiveness of these apps means that people can expand their dating options beyond their traditional social circles (Anderson et al., 2020) and allow to those who are geographically isolated to find partners ( Choi et al., 2016 ). This can be particularly beneficial if a person does not feel comfortable establishing a casual sexual relationship within their community, or if one would like to engage in specific sexual practices outside of their community’s cultural norms (Choi et al., 2016). Unlike other dating sites, dating apps allow for constant access to others (since we obviously can’t go anywhere without our phones!) and access to people who are geographically close and usually don’t have a subscription. They provide a non-intimidating and flexible way to start communicating with others and often require less time and effort than traditional dating methods (Castro & Barrada, 2020). Additionally, dating apps allow users to rate potential partners before agreeing to meet them in person, which can optimize and increase the ease of dating (Anderson et al., 2020). People also tend to feel more comfortable talking about sex in an online environment (Choi et al., 2016), so dating apps can potentially allow people to express their sexuality more honestly (Zervoulis et al., 2020). ).
Contrary to popular belief, casual sex does not seem to be the main motivation for joining a dating app. There seem to be many reasons to join, and in fact, studies have found that for up to 70% of people, seeking sex is not their primary goal (Castro & Barrada, 2020). About half of adults aged 18-29 (both straight and LGBTQ+) have reported using dating apps, and 20% of those users are married or in some form of committed relationship with someone they first met through these apps. platforms (Anderson et al., 2020). Additionally, half of people in the United States believe that relationships in which couples meet through dating apps are just as successful as those that start in person (Anderson et al., 2020).
As evidenced by the fact that members of the LGBTQ+ community are twice as likely to participate in dating apps (Anderson et al., 2020), these apps facilitate the search for partners for marginalized groups (Castro & Barrada, 2020). This happens for several reasons. For starters, not only is there a smaller percentage of people who identify as LGBTQ+, but sexual minority identity is not always obvious, making it difficult to meet LGBTQ+ people in public. Dating apps are therefore the easiest way to meet and identify people who belong to the LGBTQ+ community (Leskin, 2020). Safety is another factor. Hate crimes and prejudice against the LGBTQ+ community are still prevalent, so lack of acceptance and fear of violence can cause members to come together in person (Leskin, 2020). Dating apps can also be a safe space for “closed” people to anonymously access the community and can empower people to behave more honestly, thus having a positive effect on self-acceptance and facilitating identity processes and interpersonal relationships ( Zervoulis et al., 2020). Dating apps are therefore an easy and effective way for all people to meet new people.
Maybe we need to swipe left:
While dating apps can offer great opportunities to many, not all of them are good. Studies have shown that overall, dating app users tend to be more sexually active and more willing to take risks. There appears to be a higher prevalence of sexually transmitted infections (STIs), unsafe sex, and unplanned pregnancies among users of all sexual/emotional orientations. Users are also more likely to have at least one self-reported prior STD diagnosis (Choi et al., 2016). A study by Choi and colleagues showed that dating apps are associated with more sexual partners, more unprotected sex, and an increased likelihood of inconsistent condom use (Choi et al., 2016). While this may be the case, other studies have found that users also participate in more prevention measures, such as treatment and testing, than those who do not use dating apps, and not all studies have shown that users are less likely to use condoms (Castro & Barrada, 2020). Therefore, further studies need to be done to draw more precise conclusions. However, it is consistently the case that people on dating apps have more sexual partners, and this is a risk factor for STIs, recreational drug use, alcohol consumption, and unplanned pregnancies (Choi et al., 2016).
Some users who want to form longer-term relationships may find dating apps frustrating, as the rushed way people tend to act on these apps is inconsistent with cultural norms and the way people usually form relationships (Castro & Barrada, 2020). Dating apps also tend to focus on looks and physical attractiveness, leading to negative results. Due to the shallow nature of apps, some individuals believe that they facilitate superficial relationships rather than meaningful relationships (Anderson et al., 2020). In addition, an emphasis on physical appearance can promote excessive concerns about body image that can lead to unhealthy weight management behaviors and intense shame about one’s body. In addition, some people report dissatisfaction with their relationships formed on dating apps, as they become overly sexual quickly and move on faster than they would expect offline (Zervoulis et al., 2020).
Beyond relationship dissatisfaction, dating apps can have some other serious consequences. Some find that dating apps can pose security and privacy risks, leading to fears related to the availability of one’s personal information and location (especially for women) (Castro & Barrada, 2020). They can also become avenues for harassing behavior, such as receiving unsolicited explicit messages/images and continuing contact after someone has expressed indifference (Anderson et al., 2020). Many people also believe that it is common for people to be dishonest and misrepresent themselves by either creating scam accounts or lying to appear more desirable, which can leave people feeling frustrated and discouraged (Anderson et al., 2020 ).
So which direction should we drag?
Ultimately, dating apps not only provide a less intimidating and easier route to dating and meeting new people, but they can also be a place where one can find community and self-acceptance. However, like any social media, dating apps are good in moderation, as excessive investment or time spent swiping is associated with low psychological and social well-being (Zervoulis et., 2020). So, should you be using dating apps? As long as boundaries are set and your motivations are clear to you and others, dating apps can be great. As research shows, people use dating apps for many reasons, so over time, you’ll likely find someone for you. The negative effects of dating apps seem to manifest when we treat online dating differently than offline, so remember to be genuine, communicate well, and set the relationship right.
Ashley Kim (she/her)
Life Sciences Major (BSc) and Concurrent Education (BEd)/ Fourth Year
Queen’s University
Bibliographical references:
Anderson, M., Vogels, EA, & Turner, E. (2020, October 02). The pros and cons of online dating. Retrieved November 1, 2021, from
Castro, Á., & Barrada, JR (2020). Dating apps and their sociodemographic and psychosocial correlates: a systematic review. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 17(18), 6500. MDPI AG. Retrieved from http://dx.doi.org/10.3390/ijerph17186500
Choi, EP, Wong, JY, Lo, HH, Wong, W., Chio, JH, & Fong, DY (2016). The effects of smartphone dating app use on sexual risk behaviors among university students in Hong Kong. PloS one, 11(11), e0165394. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0165394
Jamal, U. (2021, August 03). The date was changed during the pandemic. apps follow suit. Retrieved November 1, 2021, from https://www.ctvnews.ca/lifestyle/dating-changed-duuring-the-pandemic-apps-are-following-suit-1.5532321
Leskin, P. (2020, February 06). LGBTQ adults use dating apps nearly twice as often as straight adults, Pew study finds. Retrieved November 1, 2021, from https://www.businessinsider.com/dating-apps-use-lgbtq-community-twice-as-much-straight-adults-2020-2
Sutton, KS & Blair, KL (2020). Perspectives on sexuality. In CF Pukall (Ed.), Human Sexuality: A Modern Introduction (pp. 3-25). Oxford University Press.
Zervoulis, K., Smith, DS, Reed, R., & Dinos, S. (2020). Gay dating app use and its relationship to individual well-being and sense of community in men who have sex with men. Psychology & Sexuality, 11(1-2), 88-102.
