From the ASTROGLIDE team
LGBTQ community
Think back to your high school years: going through puberty, experimenting sexually for the first time, and understanding your body in a new way. Add in your peers talking about sex in the stereotypical, usually heterosexual sense, and your parents talking to you about the birds and the bees (which was probably incredibly awkward and couldn’t end fast enough). The conversations you’ve had with your peers, family, or internally may not have given you the full picture of what your sexual preferences mean.
Well, this is the grown-up version of the birds and the bee conversation, but we’ve removed all the awkwardness and heterosexual rules. This is a space to discover what sexual fluidity means to you individually, because discovering your sexuality is an incredibly personal journey. In this blog, you’ll learn what sexual fluidity means, the ever-growing list of sexual orientations, and resources you can turn to if you have questions, to name a few. We hope you feel empowered by your sexuality and have a better understanding of your sexual orientation, attractions, and behaviors after reading on. Knowing that your sexuality can change throughout your life, we hope to be an ongoing resource for you. If there’s anything we discuss that resonates with you, we hope you’ll embrace your preferences and empower others to do the same!
First of all
Before we dive in fully, in order to have an effective discussion on the topic, it is important to note the difference between sex and gender. From WHO through Council of Europewhen we they refer to sexwe refer to the “different biological and physiological characteristics of males and females, such as reproductive organs, chromosomes, hormones, etc.”, while gender is indicated “the socially constructed characteristics of women and men – such as norms, roles and relationships between groups of women and men.” This distinction is important to note because, when we talk about sexual orientation, we are mainly (but not exclusively) discussing gender.
Most people are familiar with at least a few of the different sexual orientations, but the list continues to grow as more people express themselves freely. Dr. ASTROGLIDE’s sex-based sex researcher Justin notes that “terms like ‘gay’ and ‘straight’ have historically been used to refer to sex-based attractions about one’s gender.” But there is much more to sexuality than what we have historically discussed.
Sexual fluidity, explained
If you’re wondering what it means to be sexually fluid, then you’re in the right place. You may have heard the term “fluid sexuality,” but do you know what it means? It may seem intuitive – don’t just identify with a sexuality label, but there’s more to it than that. Simply put, no one stays the same throughout their lives, so why should sexuality be stagnant? No matter who you are attracted to, you belong to a community of people with the same orientation preferences.
At its core, sexual fluidity can be thought of as a spectrum. Some people are on the left side, some on the right, some in the middle, and all can move up or down the scale throughout their lives. As people begin to explore their sexuality or meet new people who broaden their horizons, sexual preferences may change. However, this is not necessarily a universally shared experience. While anyone can be liquid, that doesn’t mean everyone is. In fact, research has proven that women tend to be more fluid than men. This survey by APA PyscNet considers that “women are sexually fluid because of male reproductive pressure. These theories suggest that women are fluid, in part, to satisfy male sexual behavior, either by engaging in and reinforcing polygamous matings or by allowing extramarital associations for men with those women chosen by men’s mates.”
In another study by Springer Link via Wikipedia“Sexual orientation identity stability over a six-year period was more common than change, and this stability was greater among men and those who identified as heterosexual.”
It’s a label, so?
If you’re curious why someone might describe themselves as sexually fluid, Healthline has the answer: “You might describe yourself as sexually fluid when you generally identify with an orientation that doesn’t consistently represent every attraction you experience. Let’s say you’re mostly attracted to women, but you’ve had a few relationships with men. You don’t identify as bisexual, but you consider yourself somewhat fluid, since you’re not exclusively attracted to women. Maybe you’ve never had a romantic or sexual relationship with someone of your own gender. Yet, straight it doesn’t quite resonate with you as an orientation because you feel open to the possibility of a non-heterosexual relationship. It just hasn’t happened yet.” They also note that “generally speaking, sexually fluid people have an orientation that remains roughly constant over time, so you can use this term if you’re primarily attracted to one gender but want to recognize how the attraction and your answers sometimes change.”
It’s totally okay not to want to label your sexuality. Dr. Justin comments that “many of us feel pressured to name our sexuality when we may still be in the process of discovering it. Ultimately, the label of your sexual identity is up to you—and it’s okay not to be labeled. And just because you’ve labeled your sexuality doesn’t necessarily mean that others will understand or interpret it the same way you do.”
Categories and Definitions of Sexual Orientations
By now, you have realized that sexuality is not static and people’s preferences can change over time. And you probably know some of the more common sexual orientations that people often label themselves: straight, gay, bisexual, etc. So we asked Dr. Justin to introduce us to some of the types of sexuality you might not know about. , from can be identified as. As a note, this is not an exhaustive list, but some sexual relationships may not be familiar to people. For a more complete list of terms describing sexual attraction, behavior, and orientation, Healthline has a powerful article for your reading pleasure. Consider this your abbreviated dictionary of sexual orientations!
Androsexuality
Androsexual is an increasingly popular term that is often used to refer to someone who is attracted to masculinity (although, as with any sexuality label, different people may define this term in somewhat different ways). Androphiles are attracted to people with masculine characteristics, which can be physical and/or behavioral. People who are attracted don’t necessarily have a male gender or gender identity. However, some androgynous people may be attracted to masculinity only among people of a certain sex or gender. Dr. Justin notes that “while ‘androgynous’ does not have long-standing, popular use in mainstream culture, a related term ‘androphile’ has been used for decades among sex researchers as a word used to describe attraction to men or masculinity. .”
Female sexuality
Gynesexual (also spelled gynosexual) is a term often used to refer to someone who is attracted to femininity. However, as with any sexuality label, different people may have different definitions. Feminine people are attracted to people with feminine characteristics, which can be physical, behavioral, or both. People who are attracted do not necessarily have a female gender or gender identity, although some women may be attracted to femininity only among people of a certain gender or gender. He notes that “while ‘feminine’ is relatively new in mainstream culture, a related term ‘female’ has been used for decades among sex researchers as a word used to describe attraction to women or femininity.”
Allosexual
Allosexual is a term that refers to anyone who experiences sexual attraction, while asexual is a term used to describe people with a lack of sexual attraction. Gray sex People fall somewhere in between—they may experience sexual attraction from time to time, but only under certain circumstances. In short, if you are not gray or asexual, then you would be considered heterosexual.
Gray sex
If you think of sexuality as a spectrum from allosexual (someone who regularly experiences sexual attraction) to asexual (someone who completely lacks sexual attraction), “grey” would be the space occupied in the middle. These are people who may experience sexual attraction from time to time, but this happens only rarely or under very specific circumstances.
Demisexual
A demisexual person is someone who usually experiences sexual attraction only when they have a strong emotional bond with a partner. Demisexuality is often characterized as a form of gray sexuality. Someone who is demisexual can be straight, gay, bisexual, pansexual, or have other sexual identities. Demisexuality is not about gender or the gender of the people you are attracted to, but more about your relationship with said person.
Ambrosexual
Broadly speaking, abrosexual refers to being sexually fluid. For some, the changes may occur quickly, while for others, the changes may occur over much longer periods. If you experience fluctuations in your sexual attraction, behavior and/or identity, you may be abrosexual. For example, if being asexual describes you in one place, gay/lesbian in another, and bisexual or pansexual in another, this could be a sign of bisexuality. Some people who fall into the category of abrosexual may self-identify as such. However, others may label themselves as sexually fluid or adopt other labels. Sexual identification is about your self-understanding and what you are comfortable with.
Polysexuality
Polysexual is a sexual identity that reflects attraction to more than one gender, but not necessarily to all genders. It falls under the broader umbrella of polysexuality, along with bisexuality and pansexuality. All of these sexualities have their own distinct meaning, but it is important to recognize that different people may define each of these terms in different ways. So it’s important not to make assumptions about what a given identity label means to a given person.
****
Regardless of how you define your sexuality and whether or not it changes over time, understanding your sexuality can be empowering.
