Just when you thought puberty was your last hormonal hurray, say hello to perimenopause, the body chemical avalanche of middle age.
Look, we’re not going to sugar coat things here. Perimenopause can happen to all same-sex women, but just because it’s natural doesn’t mean it isn’t annoying, confusing, and even downright debilitating.
I’ve never really heard perimenopauseor do you think you are too young to start experiencing it? You are not alone.
Menopause it’s the big M word that concerns most women. You probably already know what awaits you in your 50s and beyond: a permanent cessation of your menstrual cycle accompanied by aching joints and muscles, wrinkled skin and thinning hair, and an unrelenting urge to eat dinner at 4 p.m. (and despicable).
But what confuses women in their 30s and 40s is, quite possibly, the onset of perimenopause. As its name suggests, this stage of life is the beginning of your menopausal cycle. Before you’ve completely given up the ghost that is your period through reduced estrogen, perimenopause kicks off hormonal changes that wildly affect testosterone and progesterone as well.
Estrogen generally begins to build up during perimenopause, but so do the other two major hormones in the body that regulate everything from sex drive to body odor to sleep quality. However, during “the peri,” as some ladies call it, all 3 of these hormones can also be drastically increased or thrown out of balance, leading to a cascade of physical and mental health symptoms that can feel like early dementia or an autoimmune disease.
If you think you may be perimenopausal or are experiencing any of the symptoms we discuss in this article, talk to a doctor who specializes in women’s health to rule out a more serious condition or vitamin and mineral deficiency. Perimenopause is most common for women in their late 40s and early 50s, but the medical industry is increasingly discovering that some women become perimenopausal as early as age 32.
Until your doctor’s appointment is booked, take comfort in the fact that all the weirdness coming from your body and brain can (probably) be treated and managed with a doctor who understands perimenopause and how best to treat it based on your medical history. As we now know, you’re actually not too young to start seeing these big, normal changes.
Sexual aversion
It doesn’t matter if you have or once had the sex drive of a cat in heat. During perimenopause, testosterone levels can drop along with estrogen, creating a recipe for a deadly disaster in the bedroom.
It’s one thing to have a low sex drive, which is more common during periods and menopause. Maybe you prefer sex 3 times a week now instead of the once-usual 5-7, or you just don’t have the energy to initiate sex with your partner after dinner like you used to.
Sexual aversion, however, goes a step further than a low, but still present, desire for sex. Just as the name describes, now you literally feel an aversion to sex and sex intercourse. Now your partner’s hand feels dirty (in a negative, gross way) while they squeeze your breast and kiss your neck from behind in the kitchen, or you silently roll over in disgust as their fingers slide towards your genitals for a morning copulation session.
Sex aversion is feeling like you’d happily never have sex again, and you wouldn’t even miss it.
Not all Couples have relationships that are heavily based on sex, nor is it a requirement to maintain a good bond with your partner. For the average couple, however, having some semblance of a sex life is essential to staying connected and continuing to fall in love as you both grow older.
The truth is that your testosterone and/or estrogen levels may be low and your brain is no longer getting the right signals to want sex. Low libido and sex aversion are both great reasons to seek a doctor’s advice if you feel like your 30s and 40s are killing your sex drive too early, as hormone replacement therapy can help you regain your premenopausal sexual needs. Sometimes, doctors may also add testosterone to their patient’s hormone regimen to revitalize sex drive and energy.
Really loud body odors
Does anyone cook greasy hamburgers or chop onions and garlic? No! She’s just your local perimenopausal woman, sniffing the joint with some of the strongest body odor you’ve ever smelled.
Yes, you already guessed it: changing hormones also affect your natural scents. Now, while you’re sweating more and more from every pore of your body (another lovely little symptom of menopause), you’re finding that your many showers and your old, loyal brand of deodorant don’t match your new smell.
Plus, perimenopausal odor seems to emanate from anywhere you could possibly sweat, including your crotch, that boggy patch between and under your breasts, and your legs.
Some women claim that after showering, wiping their smelliest areas with glycolic acid is almost a cure for the smell. Just be sure to do a patch test before trying a new skincare product, as glycolic acid can be irritating and drying to sensitive skin.
Other women say that lotus soap is also a good remedy to combat smelly pits and bites. Either way, you’re not imagining things and your bubble bath hasn’t stopped working. It’s just good that perimenopause is kicking up its heels again.
At your doctor’s recommendation, hormone replacement therapy can also help reduce most odor-related symptoms (and your need for 4 showers before dinner).
Night sweats soaking the sheets
The a/c isn’t broken and you don’t suddenly need a dehumidifier in your bedroom. One of the most common and insidious symptoms of menopause is the sudden onset of night sweats.
Seemingly (and literally) overnight, you wake up drenched in sweat, your blanket and sheets soaked. For many women, it’s this less-than-subtle sign that jolts them into investigating the strange health problems that end up as part of perimenopause.
Beyond the sweat alone, many women say they feel warmer in general (and not in a sexy way, unfortunately). A beloved companion can suddenly cause a new irritation as you try to stay cool at night, or the summer heat you loved now feels suffocating.
Hormones are to blame, of course, and while sleeping with a lighter blanket or fan may help temporarily, you’ll need to talk to a doctor to find a safe, medical treatment to stop night sweats and improve your sleep.
The bottom line? You are NOT too young for perimenopause
Losing all interest in sex, randomly smelling like a gym rat, and waking up in a puddle are not signs of aging that you should feel obligated to (and suffer through). We all age and we all experience hormonal changes, but perimenopause and menopause don’t have to turn your life into a miserable existence.
For doctors less experienced in perimenopause, the onset of symptoms in your 30s and 40s it can make diagnosis difficult, as some doctors simply cannot believe that a woman can enter peri at such a young age. We blame outdated medical information and a lack of medical research on women in general, something we can only hope will change in the future.
But as countless women can attest, approx box start in your 30s or 40s and there is a doctor out there who will be willing to listen to you and help you get your life back.
