Let’s make our New Year’s resolutions for pleasure this year, shall we?
Why? Simply put: pleasure is more sustainable than obligation.
You can make pleasure its own virtue, because when you feel good, it’s much easier to help others around you feel good too.
Well, here are 10 sex solutions you’ll really want to keep – pick the one that speaks to you, or shoot for all 10, you overachiever!
1. I will masturbate.
There are SO many health benefits of masturbation. Reducing stress. Better sleep. Fewer headaches! Go acoustic (using only your hands) or use a toy: as long as it hits the spots that feel good, you’re doing it right.
2. I’m going to have a sex talk.
Bottom line: having a sexual conversation is a form of liberation, for yourself and for the culture at large. AND the more you talk about sex, the more likely you are to have great sex.
3. I will value my body.
Reprogramming our brains to not just accept but actually appreciate – even celebrate – our bodies takes time, but it’s worth it. Start by focusing on what your body is does about you and not about how it looks. It carries you through life, gives you pleasure and allows you to connect with others. Practicing gratitude for your body, one small thought at a time, can lead to a deeper sense of love and confidence, both in and out of the bedroom.
4. I will explore kink.
Curiosity is the key to a fulfilling sex life and node it’s a great way to discover new levels of pleasure and connection. Start small, communicate openly and remember: exploring your desires is about fun, consensus and finding what excites you you.
5. I will try a new sex position.
I mean…nothing against Missionary. But there’s a whole world of sex stunts out there just calling your name! Check it out Sex positions guide for some hot inspo.
6. I will bring something sensual to sex.
Aka, flavored lubricant (taste), sexy music (sound), ice pops in the mouth (touch) – you can do this! Really, you can. You want to spend your whole life not knowing what it’s like for your partner’s genitals taste like creme brulee? Me neither.
7. I’m going to watch a sex show.
The world of sex entertainment is at an all-time high right now: Sex lives of college girls, sex education – just put “sex” into the Netflix search bar! You will find many quality optionsand in addition, you will normalize sexual conversations (see resolution #2) for yourself, and perhaps for a partner.
8. I will buy myself a new sex toy.
I probably don’t need to tell you about it. But know that whether you have a vulva or a penis, there is one sex toy out there for you. Let your fingers do it shopping and go for something that excites you. It’s also the perfect time to try something new!
9. I will accept my sexual fantasies.
Naughty student? Triad; Furs? It’s all good! When we say yes to our fantasies, whether we act on them or not, a special kind of alchemy happens. Pleasure becomes our teacher, revealing who we are, what excites us, and how colorful our imaginations can be.
Fantasies don’t have to be shadowy, taboo secrets that we’ve violated by their persistent appearance—rather, we can allow them to unfold mentally, partaking in all the pleasure they can bring us. Make-believe = pretending, something we were encouraged to do as children. Now that you’re all grown up, repeat after me: It’s okay to pretend.
Reminder: there are SO many healthy ways to explore fantasies. Not sure where to start? Try ethical porn to find something that tickles your fancy. (or shall we say, imagination?)
10. I will prioritize the development of my sexuality.
Your sexuality isn’t a fixed trait—it’s a journey, a spectrum, and a part of your identity that evolves throughout your life. Prioritizing growth means being open to learning, unlearning, and experimenting with what feels authentic to you. This could look like reading a book on sexual wellness or joining a supportive community like SmartSX. SmartSX is a place where you can connect with like-minded people, learn practical tools for sexual confidence, and discover your unique style of pleasure. Development is about progress, not perfection, and communities like this make the journey all the more rewarding.
Feeling excited? Yes you are. Say hello to the new year and take the time of your life to check each one off the list. Happy New Year!!
