If you and your partner are dealing with mismatched sexual desires, lack of sexual communication, sexual pain disorders, or even relationship concerns, a trip to a sex therapist can really prove to be worth your while. While the decision to seek treatment or not is yours, know that there is no shame in asking for help. Trained professionals can offer you valuable information and suggestions to help ease your concerns about sex.
What is sex therapy?
ONE studypublished in Current Psychiatry Reports, observed that 43 percent of female respondents and 31 percent of male respondents suffer from sexual dysfunctions, and 30 percent of women and 15 percent of men have sexual desire disorders.
Niyatii N Shah, sexuality educator and consultant, explains how sex therapy works. “Sex therapists have specialized training and education in human sexuality. They may be licensed therapists, psychologists or psychiatrists with special training in dealing with sexual issues. They are trained to diagnose and treat sexual dysfunctions and disorders, including issues such as erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, vaginitis and sexual trauma,” he says.
Do you need sex therapy?
There are a number of factors to consider when choosing sex therapy.
1. Persistent sexual concerns
This can include problems such as erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, sexual pain disorders, low libido or difficulties in sexual communication.
2. Relationship challenges
If your sexual difficulties are related to communication problems, conflict, or emotional distance in your relationship, sex therapy can help address both sexual and relationship issues.
3. Communication problems
If you find it difficult to talk about your desires, boundaries and concerns with your partner, or you experience mismatched desires concerns, then sex therapy can provide you with a great platform to do this.
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4. Past trauma
Past sexual trauma and abuse are often barriers to enjoying a healthy sex life. A sex therapist can help you deal with this.
5. Lack of Sex Education
Inadequate knowledge or misconceptions about sex can be addressed with a sex therapist.
6. Exploration and improvement
Sex therapy can help you discover new aspects of your sexuality and enhance your sexual satisfaction.
Read also: Stress can affect your sex life! Know the signs and how to manage it
How does sex therapy work?
1. Initial consultation
The process begins with an initial assessment. During this session, the sex therapist gets to know you and your concerns.
2. Establishing trust
Your therapist will try to create a safe space for you to talk about personal issues without fear of judgment.
3. Goal setting
You and the therapist work together to set clear goals for your sex therapy. These goals may include resolving specific sexual issues, improving communication, enhancing intimacy, or addressing relationship dynamics.
4. Education and information
The therapist can provide information about sexual health, anatomy and physiology, and dispel common myths and misconceptions about sex. This knowledge can empower you to make informed decisions and improve your sexual experiences.
5. Improvement in communication skills
The therapist can teach you and your partner communication skills to openly discuss your desires, boundaries, and concerns. This can also include dealing with past trauma, improving emotional intimacy, and resolving conflict within the relationship.
6. Exploration and evaluation
In some cases, the therapist may assign tasks or exercises for you and your partner between sessions.
7. Progress evaluation and support
The therapist will regularly assess your progress towards your goals. Once you’ve achieved your initial goals, you can decide to continue with periodic sessions for maintenance and ongoing support.
Preparation and follow-up after sex therapy
Choosing the right therapist is essential if you want to solve your problems effectively. Niyati Shah tells us how!
“Choose a qualified and experienced sex therapist with whom you feel comfortable. Consider factors such as their training, credentials and your own comfort level during the initial consultation,” he says.
Making sure you go with an open mind is another essential preparation you should do. “Therapists are there to help and aim to provide support without judgement. Hiding information will only lead to failure to achieve your goal or misleading solutions,” adds the expert.
In terms of monitoring, reflecting on the session and completing homework is essential. Self-care is also critical at this stage, says Shah. “Therapy can become very emotionally intense and you can experience multiple emotions after a session,” she explains, adding that it’s also essential to be patient and trust the process.
