I laugh at the days I thought I was busy. I used to write about self-care in chaos, I will Instagram My hourly sauna/spa routine at home and preach the magic of skin brushing. While I still stand behind these recommendations, I don’t have time for much of what I did. I’m sure you’ve heard me talk about balance and how I manage it these days as a mom, wife, business owner, and as of this summer, a backyard farmer. Among the juggling of all the hats I wear, I believe I have mastered the “baby sleeps, time for self-care” practice. I’m talking about what we can do at home in an hour or less to maximize our time for our own personal well-being. Time is short and we must take care of ourselves.
To help you do this in your own life, I’ve outlined some of my “rules” below, as well as my favorite ways to take in those 60 minutes of true “me time.”
The three rules of the sleep self-care game
1. Overcome time stress
This is easier said than done. One of the things that is so hard for me personally is figuring out what to do with my time on the weekends when my boyfriend goes to his nap. I almost always end up with FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) if I don’t plan ahead how I’m going to use my time during each precious nap.
My Mom’s Non-negotiable Care Tip: Choose one nap a week that is 100% about you and your needs.
Set aside that nap, and if you don’t have the defining nap to take advantage of, then your goal is to find that one hour that can be all yours. The key is to mark that time of the week and commit to it as if it were the most important meeting on your calendar.
Monday to Friday I work, some days from home and some days from my office. My one and only nap is usually the first nap of the day on a Saturday or Sunday. I commit to it in advance and plan how I’m going to use it.
2. You need to turn off your phone
I don’t want to hear any “buts” about it. We’re all guilty of aimlessly scrolling through our phones, wasting more time than we’d like to think. What are we looking for? And do you feel better or worse after spending time doing this? Watching pointless TV or wasting our time double-tapping on our phones can touch relax because you are not actively doing anything. The reality is that it is quite the opposite. It activates our nervous system, increasing our fatigue level and perhaps most importantly, as it relates to what we’re talking about here, it takes you out of the present moment. The whole point of this practice is to be present and enjoy. Hang up those phones. It will be there waiting for you when you return.
3. Making it work at home
Sure, I could recommend tons of self-care options outside of the home, but the name of the game here is to assume you’re short on sleep and only have 60 minutes. Things outside the home usually also require travel time, so we’re limited to the space we’re in.
8 ways to maximize self-care in an hour or less
1. Spa experience at home
This is my personal favorite, so it goes first. I lock myself in the bathroom, start taking a bath, pull out all my favorite personal care products that I don’t get to use often enough, and start taking care of me. I personally choose Living Libations* the products as the essential oils really make it feel like a spa experience. Use what you have, configure it and define your personal sequence of functions. The photo above was taken on Mother’s Day.
This is my line-up:
2. One hour of yoga or physical activity of your choice
30 minutes of yoga is easier to squeeze in. Even 45 minutes is possible. There is something magical that happens when you keep your body moving for a full 60 minutes. I’m not into online workouts, but some of my favorite online gyms include:
3. Take your own nap for goodness sake
Make it count. I’m the world’s worst napper, but if I’m tired enough, I might fall asleep. I often end up just lying down with my eyes closed, but I still feel refreshed. There is a basic secret to a daytime nap. The sleeping mask. Get a cotton sleep mask (and filled with cotton or wool!). He is a dreamer. I’ve found great ones on Etsy and use them for sleep and bedtime.
4. Meditate
I’ve been meditating for twelve years and I’m not even close to wanting to sit for sixty minutes. You don’t need to. That’s not the point. Maybe you sit for ten or twenty or thirty minutes. But build your ritual around it so you really get into it deeply. Maybe start with five minutes of deep breathing, then 20 minutes of meditation, 20 minutes of shavasana (everyone’s favorite yoga pose), then journal. You have sixty minutes. What’s really magical about meditation is that you can feel stress in that moment, that feeling of stress and anxiety coming to the surface and unraveling. Stay with him. The benefit of meditation comes from the practice itself, not the results. Believe that results are happening even if you don’t feel them right now. With meditation, you play the big game.
5. Do something creative
Remember once upon a time you had a hobby? Me too! I’m trying to grow mine again, but it’s not easy to find the time. Creative projects feed different parts of the brain than we use when working or doing everyday activities. Whether you’re playing an instrument, creating a recipe, or doing a craft project – it all counts. My arts lately include; crochet and macrame and I love the latter because a macrame plant holder is a project I can start, enjoy, and finish in less than an hour. I also recently killed a craft to sew a washable stroller cover. The joys of simple things.
So whether your art is coloring in a coloring book, making a friendship bracelet, crafting a scrapbook, or any other creative endeavor, remember what you used to do in your spare time and start doing it. Every moment you spend doing something that nourishes your soul is a deposit in the happiness account.
6. Step Out into the Sunshine
You need a yard, porch or balcony for this, but if you have access, the fresh air and sunshine alone are invaluable for reviving the spirit. Maybe you have a book you want to read (ideally not about sleeping habits, feeding your baby, or other parenting stuff), but that’s pure fun. Sit in the sun and read that book, or drink that tea, or eat your lunch. We have a baby monitor that we use just for this purpose.
7. Plant Materials
Maybe this isn’t directly related to taking care of yourself, but tending to plants, transplanting them, watering them, grooming them, maybe even fancying them and propagating them can be extremely nourishing. Plants are a very new thing in my world and I’ve spent more than one nap going through my plant catalog and determining what I’m doing wrong that seems to be killing them all. Plants enhance the air quality in your home and improve mental and emotional well-being. Studies show that interaction with indoor plants suppresses psychological stress.
8. Take a long shower, apply products and wear fresh clothes
This might seem silly, but trust me. Most days, my showers feel more like running through a sprinkler. So when I’m in dire need of some alone time while also needing to use sleep to prepare to leave the house, this is it. Similar to the Home Spa I described above, my lengthy shower self-care routine includes:
Make it happen
Never feel guilty about taking that time for yourself. Guilt is never worth your energy. You deserve it a thousand times over. As mothers we give, give, give. If we don’t take some time to replenish our stores, fill our tank a little, we’ll be running on empty. That’s when the crash will hit us hardest. Aim to set aside an hour a week that is yours, all yours. Own it. Enjoy it. You are amazing. Celebrate this. Some weeks will undoubtedly challenge you more than others. Some days you might feel like you’re just killing it all. The ebbs and flows of motherhood will never fail to bring us to our knees, but I believe this only gives us the opportunity to look up and rise higher than we ever thought possible. And it all starts with taking care of ourselves.
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