While we don’t really measure happiness in pregnancy (like we do your blood pressure) We know that happier pregnancies tend to lead to happier outcomes with less postpartum depression and anxiety after the baby is born. Sure, we can we do things to be happybut what can our PARTER do to help us have a happier pregnancy. I have some great ideas!
And this is seen by thousands of couples walk through my delivery roomstalking to millions of you online and I also have 3 babies of my own (and a marriage approaching 30 years). I think these are simple things they can do that show they care and can make you happier.
Go to (or chat about) Dates
Prenatal appointments can be a huge chore. They can also feel useless as you walk into the office only to find that “everything is fine” and go on your way (honestly, the best case scenario — but I’ve come to realize that it can be a waste of time).
Having a friend over can make everything a little more bearable (think: lunch or dinner afterwards?). Plus, sometimes they can see the magic of a prenatal appointment that you just can’t.
You are raising this man within from you, but they can only see the later results and that is in the full presentation on these prenatal checks.
Now, I know not every family can change schedules where you can both go. So talking about them afterward, how you felt about it and what you learned—and maybe even take some time to explain how the loss of time they feel can be a win.
Another can go to glucose test with you Honestly it’s just one wretched affair… a long, boring, often uninteresting hour. Having a chauffeur and a friend in it would feel incredibly cool.
Note: Coming to the appointments is a good start — but understanding what lies ahead makes an even bigger difference. Preparing together helps you both feel more confident, less anxious, and ready for what’s to come.
I should also say that my husband maybe came on a date or two with me and all 3 kids. He was a teacher and we had to save sick days. It just wasn’t possible, but he was interested, and he met my doctor early for an appointment. That’s why I gave some ideas, because I know these won’t work for everyone!
To remind you how amazing you are
You are literally growing another person inside of you!
Honestly, when you take a step back, you realize it’s REALLY amazing.
But when you’re the one doing it multiple times, you just see how they start to take over your body as their own. Sometimes you need a different perspective they can give!
I feel like pregnancy can feel lonely – when this job is one you basically do alone. It can be helpful to have them fan you for all the work you do. They should not be shy with compliments!
Looking for more partner ideas? — be sure to check out these posts:
Get ready with you
Preparing for birth isn’t something you have to figure out on your own—and it makes a big difference when you don’t.
This does not mean that if your partner is not interested in labor preparation, he is not a good one. It may be necessary let them know that’s what you want. I mean, most of the time our bodies are our own business, but in childbirth it’s different. You bring this baby home together!
Many couples go into labor feeling unsure of what to expect, which can lead to anxiety, confusion and second thoughts. But when you take the time to prepare together, you both begin to understand how labor usually goes, what are your optionsand how to handle the moments that might otherwise immobilize you.
This shared understanding helps you feel more confident, less overwhelmed and better able to make informed decisions as things happen.
Be careful to choose a class that includes they are smart. A lot of classes leave partners in the dust and only talk to “mom” — and I just disagree with that basically.
It also changes the way you support each other. Most partners want to help, but you don’t always know what to do — and that uncertainty can add stress to both of you.
When you’ve learned together earlier, you’re on the same page, speaking the same language, and working as a team instead of trying to figure it out in real time. This is what helps labor feel calmer, more connected and more manageable.
The actual preparation has nothing to do with it knowing everything — it’s about feeling prepared, informed and supported no matter how your birth turns out.
If you want to feel more prepared, less anxious, and truly confident after giving birth, the best thing you can do is learn together. Within The online prenatal course for couples, you’ll both understand what to expect, your options, and how to support each other — so you don’t right now.
Fill your water bottle
It’s small, but water can make a huge difference in how you feel during pregnancy.
This one habit of filling it every morning can set you on a path to drinking it.
Honestly, if I don’t fill up my water glass, I think my intake is about half of what it would be if I did. Which is sad, but real.
Small, simple gestures like this can go a long way. Moreover, when they get into a habit like this it can also help your breastfeeding journey. It’s just a simple thing that can really help.
Looking for more on hydration in pregnancy? — be sure to check out these posts:
Prepare for the birth of the baby
Note: I didn’t say baby prep — I’m talking about postpartum preparation. A good partner will remember that you’ll need some TLC along with managing a new baby — so they’ll work to prepare a good place for you to come home to.
Yes, that includes building the crib, but also things like making sure your bathroom is clean, your pads are easy to grab.
BTW, there are a few things you’ll want to have on hand — I have a postpartum checklist to help you with this:
And, one of my favorites — installing a Bidet (this post is about Tushy, but there are tons of brands out there now — will give you an idea of how it can help)!
I loved my cold bottle after each baby… a bidet would be SO nice! They’re not too expensive, you can pick them up at your local home improvement store, and they’re pretty easy to install!
That doesn’t mean they shouldn’t help you get all the things you need for baby — I’ve got a fluff-free checklist here:
BUT there is more to preparing for your baby.
You’re really going to need some TLC when you get home, and it’s easy to think you’re young and will bounce back quickly, but often you don’t — so it’s smart for them to know they’re up to the task of “taking care of you.”
Supporting mom after birth is just as important as caring for baby — and knowing what to expect makes all the difference. Within The online prenatal course for couplesyou’ll both learn how to feel prepared, confident, and ready for those first few days postpartum (which SO many people do — including me before The Pregnancy Nurse®).
What did I miss? What does your partner do to help you have a happier pregnancy? Tell me in the comments!
