Too much work at the office or housework can make you feel really tired. So, you may feel too tired for sex. Don’t worry, you can still enjoy sex after a long day.
There are days when you may feel too tired for sex. It may be due to lack of sleep or too much work at the office or at home. Taking care of children, spouse or elderly parents along with office work can wear you down. Sometimes you’re too stressed to even think about sex. But as it happens, good sex can change your mood and energy! Even if you have a lot on your plate, you can still enjoy sex. Read on to learn how to enjoy sex after a long day.
Why is a satisfying sex life important in a relationship?
A fulfilling sex life is an undeniable aspect and prerequisite for a healthy relationship, says holistic sexuality educator and public health and gender anthropologist Artika Singh. In general, good sex is associated with improved intimacy, building trust, and resolving conflict within relationships. In relationships, a good sex life can also become a means through which one expresses love, commitment, and compatibility to one’s partner, and is also an area that allows partners to explore communication styles.
A good sex life also has physical and mental health benefits such as stress reduction, happiness, hormonal regulation and better sleep. According to a 2019 survey published in Sexual Medicine, frequent sexual activity, at least twice a month, is associated with benefits for psychological and physiological well-being. Benefits include improved quality of life and mental health.
Why are some women too tired for sex?
Sex is not just a physical act. Rather, it is a physical and emotional expression of one’s sexuality – alone or with a partner. Accordingly, the reasons for feeling excessively tired can be many. Sexual dysfunctions in women such as vaginal dryness, vulvodynia and anorgasmia can cause anxiety about sex that leads to avoiding sex altogether, says the expert. Stress, lack of sleep, hormonal imbalances can make one feel tired for any activity including sex.
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Other factors are:
- Relationship conflicts
- Worry
- Depression
- Decreased sex drive
Identifying what is causing your sex fatigue can help you address the concern with a professional and slowly regain interest in sex.
How to enjoy sex after a long day?
If you want to enjoy sex after a long day at work, you can do the following:
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1. Destress
Instead of jumping straight into sex, take time to relax and do whatever relaxes you. This could include a warm bath, yoga, mindfulness practice. A calmer mind means a better chance of arousal and pleasure.
2. Talk to your partner
Communication is the key to a healthy relationship. Talking to you helps you build a deeper relationship. It can help lead to better sex, says Singh.
3. Nourish yourself
After calming your mind, it’s also important to nourish and hydrate your body. It also gives you the energy to engage in sex.

4. Don’t forget the foreplay
Set the mood with candles, music, blankets, even a movie. These can be part of your foreplay, which can help you transition from casual to relaxing sex. Also, candles, scented oils and music can awaken your senses and help you feel more present.
5. Go solo
Whether you have a partner or not, some days masturbation can be the relaxing activity you need. Combine it with a warm bath, candles and music.
6. Be kind to yourself
It’s okay not to want to have sex every now and then. This may be due to physical fatigue or some other reason. You and your partner may not always want to have sex at the same time, and that’s okay, says the expert. Acknowledge your needs, be kind and do what feels best.
Don’t forget about aftercare! Usually, aftercare is associated with servitude, discipline, dominance, submission and sadism. But she can practice any form of sex to overcome fatigue, come back to reality after sex, and even sleep better. You can drink water, pee or cuddle after sex.